My people buy me all kinds of toys. I think they are trying to buy my love. I'm ok with it. Little do they know that I love them anyway. Please don't tell them that. I do like the toys. Not to mention it helps me with my emergency plan.

Every dog has an emergency plan. We must be prepared in case of a home invasion. People think we are good for stopping those types of things. Well, I have an emergency plan and I'm going to share it with you.

I like to drag my toys under the bed. They are various sizes of stuffed animals. Some of them are just as big as me. My people wonder why I bring them all under the bed, never to be seen again. They call that place "The Island of Misfit Toys."

I like to call it my "Survival Den." In the event of a home invasion, I will quietly hide under the bed and play dead. The invader will mistake me for one of the toys and I will be left alone, unharmed.

My people are on their own. But that's our little secret. Please don't tell them. I'll deny it and then you'll just look stupid. Like the cat. And no one wants to be a cat.